So much angst. So much desire to prove yourself to others. That's what goes on. So much justification - I do X, and here is why X is good... or perhaps even more, here is why X is the virtuous thing to do, the CHRISTIAN thing to do. All good Christians should and ought to do X!
To whom must you prove yourself?
Seriously. Do you *need* to prove yourself to your neighbor? Does it matter a hill of beans what they think? No.
Do you *need* to prove yourself to God? The only thing you will prove to God is that you are in and of yourself a sinner who falls short of what you ought to be doing - no matter how virtuous or uber-Christian you are.
We all fall into this. We want to demonstrate that we are right, good, better, spot on, what have you. And you know what - when we step back, it's silly. Think of the proofs, think of the justifications you've given in the past week. How many were... lies? (Well, not real lies, I mean, I did it, I just fudged it a bit... you know... I lied). How many were lies to yourself, justification for yourself to do something you shouldn't or not do something you should? Need I mention the plans I had for today that I blew off (or need I even mention how by writing this post now I can pat myself on the back and say I'm at least doing something religious...)
See, if we look at ourselves honestly, the "proof" tends to spiral down into the gutter quickly. How quickly it goes down, down, down.
Who for us men and for our salvation came down from heaven.
Christ is quicker to come down than we are. He sees us, He knows us to be trapped in this stupid cycle of self-justification (because that is what attempting to "prove" yourself is) and self-righteousness (because that is what thinking you've "proved" yourself is)... and He comes and He puts an end to it.
Christ says, "I will be your righteousness. I will be your proof. Though your sins are are scarlet, they will be white as snow. See, I have risen. See My Hands, My Side - they are your proof - and there is nothing more for you to prove, nothing you could prove."
You cannot prove yourself to God. Thanks be to God that He proves you unto Himself in Christ Jesus.